Seasons change, dogs moult, yet some spats are doomed to rumble until the end of time. Today, Jezebel is most put out by a recent survey of contemptuous British attitudes towards the inexorable march of Americanisms into the English language [Jezebel: Brits hate you for saying 'train station']. All the usual suspects are heres: apparently, we Brits loathe the words "gotten" and "normalcy", are full of hatred for the phrase "you do the math", and will just stab anyone who orders a "take-out". The US response is disgruntled, to say the least: "other horrid consequences of American influence include ladies wearing trousers, men being seen in public without their powdered wigs, and mass unemployment of footmen," snarketh back Jezebel.
So, before muskets start being fired, or I get placed in some sort of holding facility, I simply must set something straight. My 'fellow' Americans: this so-called canvassing of Brit opinion comes not from any rational source, but from the denizens of the 'Have Your Say' recesses of the BBC News site. For anyone unfamiliar with this shadowy netherworld, it's an arena so astonishingly intolerant that somebody has actually created a separate website just to catalogue the worst excesses of its "dribble-spattered lunacy". These are people who post things like "the whole idea of females working outside the typical occupations of teaching, nursing, agriculture and so on is wildly impractical". They think racial profiling doesn't go far enough, and that the re-implantation of chain gangs is the only way to tame Britain's youth. They're the ones that make the famously rabid Daily Mail commenters think "steady on, guys".
In short: if there's a group of people who are going to email the BBC in droves when invited to talk about something foreign they don't like, it's this lot. So, 'burglarize' aside (because that one really is mental): stand down, America! The British are not coming.
One more thing though. What is wrong with saying "train station"?